As it is early New Year with many resolutions going around, I'm bigger on results than resolutions. That being said, I would like to introduce to you the "90 Day Challenge" which I'm going to explain here. It is essentially an abstinence contract (i.e. I'm not going to engage in my destructive behaviour for such a time).
Here's how it works-
1) Start the challenge when you're ready (the sooner the better)
2) Identify the behaviour you want to "challenge"/stop for 90 days e.g. no sex (with self or others), no junk food, alcohol, gambling etc.
3) Notice your thoughts i.e. when you have a using/doing fantasy (e.g. "I can just imagine myself pouring a bottle of red wine into my favourite glass and...") there is a 3 second rule to STOP the thought/fantasy. NOTE: You can even say to yourself out loud "STOP!"
4)If you have a partner, get their support (especially if it is a "no sex" challenge which often involves another person/partner) and let them know as well what the expectation/rules are for this challenge.
5) If you have a major chemical addiction/dependence, please see the Addiction ebook provided in our program regarding some new treatments for withdrawal and cravings that might also help.
This challenge will do a number of things for you. It will retrain and rewire your brain toward abstinence. It will stop you from getting triggered and "hooked in" each time you have a thought about using or acting out. You will begin to realize you can survive without the addictive behaviour.
You will notice other beneficial things occur when you take on this challenge as well. I know some of you have gone without your addictive hook i.e. sex/alcohol/gambling/junk food etc for 30, 40, 50+ days. You've done it before! Believe you can do it for the 90 days, i.e. extend your threshold!
My Life Recovery Contract
In the highest interest of my being and for the purpose of my recovery, I ________________ (name) choose to commit to the following observable behaviours for the next 90 days________ __________ ___________ ________________________ (e.g. exercise, attend counselling, AA, grief group, stop yelling at my kids etc...)
To help me along my journey I will ask/recruit the following ____________ _______________ (e.g. mom, dad, sibling, friend, co-worker etc..) for the following____________ ¬________________ (e.g. to exercise with me, to remind me of my counselling/group appointments, to be my go to/safe person for me to share my feelings) etc…
To be realized by this date____________ 90 days from now.
Witnessed by Date
Best of health and warmest regards, Paul Radkowski